vagabond...

hmm,
as u leav...
sumtimes in hesitation,
u tend to turn arnd
all the time wonderin'
sum part of u left behind...
in essence.


curiously,
conversely...

Solitary travels
upon
unknown existence
closed faces
&
naked apprehension.
A while of acceptance
then
the restless desire
not my world
not my stay
Time to pack up life
in one expression
of held back emotion
as i hold...
time in one moment.
Life touched
some part... never the same
what strange confusion...
in just awhile
they've left with me
the soul... of their existence.
Yet,
no time to look back,
pack up... move on
till only
another people
another acceptance.
Then again,
its not my world
not my stay
another life
embibed in me.
Another colour
to a black and white existence.
Now,
as i look back...
Weaving together threads
of broken worlds
from over the map
shaded in hues,
I realise...
I'm just not the same.

DREAM

DREAM FOR ONE DAY IT WILL COME TRUE,
DREAM FOR ONE DAY YOU WILL PASS THROUGH,
DREAM TILL THIS SKY IS BLUE,
FOR THIS EARTH IS GOIN AROUND AND YOUR GOOD DEEDS WILL FOLLOW YOU.

A dream Deferred

What happens to a dream deferred?
Does it dry up like a raisin in the sun?
Or fester like a sore-- And then run?
Does it stink like rotten meat?
Or crust and sugar over-- like a syrupy sweet?
Maybe it just sags like a heavy load.
Or does it explode?

--- Langston Hughes

Depression? Beat this..

somehwere around 4 pm...and i am sitting in office working on some quote..and the cell phone rings..
...
" hie.. howz you.. iwas in this part of town"
arrey no yaar.. i am stuck up till late..
"kya yaar.. we never get to meet.. take out some time.."
Tsk.. no baba..
".. aha you know..i had to tell you this really bad news...."
What..?
"..........."
what ..speak something..
"...you that ex of time.. the one i saw seeing in collge for a loong time and we broke off...."
what happened...

".. you know he committed Suicide...."

WHAT?????..like why ...
" ... he was depressed..."
No , i mean is this remotely related to you / your relation types..?
".......... well.. kind off yes.."

...........
I was staring at the monitor...all those 6 digit numbers in the twenty sheets opned in the xcel file getting completely wonky!!
i had litrally lost my breath for a second..

'... i had gone for his last rites in pathankot last week..."

WHAT!!!!! ( double what....) why?/
"... no yaar... her mom had called me ..he had left a suicide not ..that he is taking this decsision on his own.. and he could not take it any more..no-one has got anything to do with this......"

........
" His mom wanted me to be there.. at least.... at the ending..."
..........

" One day before he courired this Box ...to me here....."
"... with all our old stuff... movie tics, gifts , cards, letters..stuff"
".. i have been crying for days and nites together...."
" mom flew in and is staying with me here..."

I was gaping/...
Consoled her..tried to sidetrack her...

god only knows how i finished my work..
mindz been pretty tizzy..

and ya sm one was askling about depression???

definations invited please